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Showing posts from June, 2013

childproof's First Recordings!

Spider porridge b/w moneyshot (androgynous) is the newest release from the Mugwump Corporation's favorite band, childproof. But the tracks themselves aren't anything new. In fact, they're pretty old. Humble songwriter JP Marin was just seventeen when he recorded these tracks, way back when weird kids in black shirts were recording their tunes onto cassette tapes. Our younger readers can feel free to Email me and I'll explain what a cassette tape is.

What I like about both of these songs is that you can already sort of see the beginnings of the two very different directions the band would come to take. These days, childproof records foot-tapping pop songs a la "dance while the sky falls." At the same time, they play improvisational noise music with the    likes of New York's Gary Wilson and Thee Pause.

You can hear both of these tendencies most clearly on the song "moneyshot (androgynous)". There's the Beatles influence in the vocals, but the…

Tony Danza Taps On Walls To Make Sure There Aren't Any Trolls Or Gremlins Inside

You probably know Tony Danza from the hit 80's sitcom, Who's The Boss? What you might not know is that he's a paranoid freak who should never be left alone with power tools, tiny uncles, rodents that smoke hashish or even Michael Buble.

Folks, this whole thing has just gotten way out of control. Tony Danza is so insane that just the other day he forced dozens of bunny rabbits to wear cammo onesies and hop across the street to harass his neighbor. In order to prepare his rabbit army for battle, Tony Danza stood on an apple crate with several banana nut bread muffins stacked atop his head and said, "Hark! Let us go forth with extreme jocularity and with a vibration of our testicals so strong and hearty that it will make the gods sing in triumph!" And they marched across the street into the neighbor's yard and started right off making fun of the guy's tiny pear-shaped hands. Then the old man fell over dead. And Tony Danza just laughed and laughed as his bun…

Nursing Home's Debut EP

While it's true that the band Nursing Home is heavily rooted in darker electro-based rock from the 90's (bands like Orgy and Mindless Self Indulgence come to mind), they're unique enough to firmly place them in the 21st Century. But that's kind of an odd quirk we have about rock-n-roll, isn't it? Nobody would say to a bluesman that his stuff reminds them of the kind of blues people were playing only fifteen years ago. But with rock and other forms of popular music, ten years on and a certain sound is considered ancient, a freakin' relic. Rock people have really lost their concept of Cosmic Time. A sad thought, indeed.

This self-titled debut album includes four songs and a short intro track. It's got a slower tempo than you might expect from this kind of music. It's appropriate, though, considering the themes on the album. Characters sludging through a drug-fueled life, the horror of the everyday. Life creaking along, slowly, slowly. A very nice artisti…

Hey Jerk, When Are You Going To Take Me To Funkytown?

So for the past few decades I've been like, "Won't you take me to Funkytown?" and you always give me some lame-o cop-out answer. "Nah, can't do it, buddy," you say. "I'm sanding my cat." Or you say something like, "I'd really love to, but I have to pour pickle juice over my grandmother. I've been delaying for weeks and now she's well past due."

This is all so disappointing, especially since you've always said such awesome things about Funkytown. All that talk about people walking down the streets, swinging their hips to and fro, saying things like, "Heeey soul cracka!" and "Oh honey child, you've sure got some sassy toenails!" Is it true that we get to wear a glittery cape if we want to? And that this is a place where James Brown never truly died?

I'd just go to the place by myself, but I can't find it on Google Maps. Is it true that you can only get there via Sex Machine? Will I s…

Daisy Kids Release First Single, Square In The Minor

Momma always said you ain't gonna play no harp with a shotgun. But I disagree. And the Daisy Kids' first single, "Square In The Minor" is proof.

The first official release from Thee Pause and Daisy Berkowitz, this track is full of practical advice for nursing homes and caretakers of all types. "Clean out your head with LSD" being the most practical piece of advice, naturally. And...bravo! Because LSD is good for a great deal of things, including sharpening your sense of humor, something you'll want to have when you listen to the Daisy Kids or follow them on Facebook. Thee Pause programs the beats for the danceaholics in the room and Berkowitz handles guitar and vocals. Add the kitchen sink and you have "Shoot the shit pipe," which is more than just a lyric from the song, but a mantra for the post-aquatic ape theory generation. If we're going to live up to the hype promised in Ancient Aliens, we're gonna need songs like these to help u…