|via tom brown|
For his entire life, Mr. Mason Dixon lived in Hollatop, Maryland. But when gay marriage was legalized in his home state, he decided that it was time to move a little further south.
But what if Virginia, his adopted home, somehow manages to pass a marriage equality law? "I'll keep moving south," Mr. Dixon said. "By the time I reach Georgia, I should be safe for a while."
When asked what exactly he had against homosexuals, Mr. Dixon said, "I think they're all secretly enchiladas. I can only hope that their fakery will be exposed in time, and good Americans will never have to fear being turned into Tex-Mex dishes."
There are many versions of the Enchilada Conspiracy. Some people believe that homosexuals are actually tacos. However, there is a fringe group within the movement who believe that homosexuals are actually beach balls and water pails. But nobody really talks about them much.
But for Mason Dixon, what homosexuals are actually composed of is a moot point. "Whether they're bouncy or spicy, they shouldn't be getting married."
Some have suspected that Mason Dixon himself is actually an aardvark, though this has never been proven.